I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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