I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize
