Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
