There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Randomize
