there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Randomize