if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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