How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
