My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Randomize