More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
do herpes really smell.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
