Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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