i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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