have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
