the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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