In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
