i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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