My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Found your dick twin last night
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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