I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Randomize
