Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
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