After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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