She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
