This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
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