Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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