the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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