The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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