Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
