It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
and she was petting her beer can
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Randomize
