help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Randomize
