We won't sleep together?
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
