champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
