Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
