when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Randomize