You don't have asthma, your pregnant
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
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