some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
He has the fingertips of a God
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
