Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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