I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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