In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
handjob tips. give me some.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
