Christians are straight up FREAKS
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize