we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
