Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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