MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
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