So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
