First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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