Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
