I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize