Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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