So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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