What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
