I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
