I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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