omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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